Mia: Shaken Not Stirred

The true life stories of a NYC female.

Thursday, July 17, 2008


My peeps and by my peeps I mean certain females from my generation are geniuses and by geniuses I mean idiots, total idiots. Genius female decided to have sex with her equally brilliant boyfriend at her job while on duty during the over night shift. In a flash of utter brilliance the two geniuses decided to film themselves doing the deed….they used the office surveillance camera…taped right over the surveillance video and then forgot about it and left the video in the camera. I told you they were geniuses.

As fate would have it a pipe in the ceiling busted a few days later flooding the entire facility and damaging customer’s property. Corporate all men by the way decided that they wanted to view the surveillance tape for insurance purposes in front of some suits and insurance agents also all men. You may now gasp.

--It’s not funny!

-Au Contraire Mon Chéri I beg to differ that crap is hysterical!

--Screw you!

-Female stop the violence. Come on you know if it had been anyone else you would be dying right now, true yes?



--You’re so stupid.

-Could be but at least a conference room full of men did not just spend the morning watching my hoo-hah on a humongous TV screen.

--Oh God.

-Look stop beating yourself up over it. It can’t be undone so instead of making yourself crazy find the humor in it and laugh.

--Oh God

-From what I heard no one outside of corporate knows it was you.

--What you mean?

-Okay well the news about the video tape is making the rounds but the head honchos are not revealing who the female was so unless you tell anyone about it no one will know it was you. As for future employment I’m pretty sure they won’t reveal the reason you were fired. They have an image to protect and it wouldn’t look too good on them for clients to find out that instead of taking care of business the employees were taking care of business and videotaping over security tapes.

She groaned.

-At least you went out with a bang, pun intended.

--God you’re so twisted!

-That goes without saying 3 kinds of twisted last I counted and yet none of them involve me doing the humpty on video. Imagine that.

--I’m going to be sick.

-I promise you will get over this. Look at what it did for Paris Hilton.

She laughed.

-See that’s a start.

--Oh God I just had a thought; they didn’t give me the tape back.


--No! Lord knows how many copies were made of that tape and passed around. Oh my God.

-Oh snap.


-If I were you I’d check you tube every day.


Posted by @ 9:54 AM
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