Mia: Shaken Not Stirred

The true life stories of a NYC female.

Tuesday, July 31, 2007

Never underestimate the Boriqua chick or the rhythm embedded in her DNA

I tend to surprise the heck out of people and no it’s not because I hide in dark corners and jump out at them. I surprise people because they have a tendency to underestimate me, especially on the dance floor. People never seem to get the fact that music is my God, my religion. The dance floor is my church and dancing is my spiritual release.

I’m in a Latin club geared to the 30 and up crowd on the floor dancing with a friend when a guy cuts in. The three of us do some salsa, meringue, and even a little bachata. All is good then the DJ throws on some old school free style music. My friend gets off the dance floor because she knows this is all me. I grew up on freestyle. The music is pumping; the DJ is playing a classic,“Maria”. It is time for some serious dancing now. The best way I can describe what freestyle dancing for those unfamiliar with it is that it's a form of hip hop dancing born back in the days when my folks were teens.

I’m guessing that back in his day this was my partner's genre. This song was his jam and he kicked major ass on the floor when it came on. Judging from the look on his face and his body language school was officially in session and he saw himself as the teacher and me as the pupil. He threw some fancy moves my way and I repeated them adding some of my own to the mix. A smile slowly crossed his face as he realized that I knew how to freestyle. He shook his head realizing it wasn't not going to be so easy to impress me on the dance floor. My moves had revealed that I was on equal footing with my so called teacher. It wasn't about teaching now it was about pride... his.

He threw down the challenge and it was on. A crowd gathered around us calling out their encouragement as our steps got more and more complicated each of us trying to out do the other. Step vs step we battle it out our feet moving in a frantic frenzy arms and bodies twisted in ways I’m sure neither God nor evolution had ever intended. At one point he stepped back to watch me dance. He shook his head in disbelief, he jumped in and threw a few more steps my way this time thrusting his chest into mine. I thrust back and do a spin bringing it down to the floor with one hand behind my back. I quickly pop up and shaking my hips end up an inch from his face. I then threw him the coup de grâce; I dusted my shoulders off smiled and gave him a wink. He laughed and finally threw his hands in the air he gave up. He conceded he couldn't keep up with me and sure as hell couldn't beat me. Before leaving the dance floor he bowed to me and kissed my hand. The crowd exploded with applause. Never under estimate the Boriqua chick or the rhythm embedded in her DNA.

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Posted by @ 2:27 PM
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Saturday, July 28, 2007

Movie Etiquette

I’m a movie person. I don't discriminate when it comes to movie genres. From foreign to historical I love them all. Nothing compares with the thrill of watching a good flick for the first time on a huge movie screen the size of brownstone building. While some would argue that you can get the same thrill watching at home on a big screen TV I say uh uh…no way José. It’s not the same. There’s something about sitting in the dark with a hundred other people in a theater that makes the experience just more enjoyable. You sit there with your snack and beverage of choice for about 90 minutes and if you’re lucky enough that everything in the movie falls into place time flies by and at the end of it you don't regret shelling out the bucks to have seen the flick.

However there’s also something about sitting in the dark with 100 other people that makes you want to smack fire out of some of them. You know who I’m talking about the ones who talk throughout … or the ones who read the book and want to compare the movie to the book on the spot. STFU putos! I’m trying to get into the flick…. The couple right next to you groping each other and doing lord knows what with the jumping jacket thrown over their laps. Get a room people! Oh yeah and the tall guy who swears he’s made out of glass and stands in front of you blocking the screen while he s out his wedgie. Cut the crap out man!

Here’s a little clip on movie etiquette Aqua Teen Hunger Force style ….

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Posted by @ 2:33 AM
3 comment from: Blogger DannieS72, Blogger Mia, Blogger DannieS72,

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Not nice, not nice at all

It had been nine years since I had seen my paternal grandparents. They finally arrived last week for a visit and as we headed over to the upper west side to see them this past Sunday my siblings teased me “ohhhh Mia wait ‘til grandpa sees your tattoos. You’re in BIG trouble!” Ha! I’m an adult now grandparents don’t strike no fear in this 24 year old heart!

We'd been in the house for an hour and no one had noticed my tattoos. My plan was working. My short sleeves had been long enough to cover the tats. Then it happened… a fly landed on my arm and I shooed it away pushing my sleeve up a little. My little sister seized the opportunity….

Caity: What’s that Mia?
Mia: What’s what?
Caity: That…( pointing at my arm )what’s that?
Mia: I don’t know what you’re talking about.
I tugged on the edge of my sleeve making sure it was covering the tat while my sister let out a diabolical giggle .

My grandma leaned in and raised the edge of my sleeve up with her finger…

GM: What is that?
Mia: Umm a tattoo grandma.

She called my grandfather over. He stared in disbelief at the tattoo. My sister (I’m cutting her out of my will by the way) then added…

Caity: Look at her other arm grandpa!
Mia: Nobody likes a kiss ass Caitlin Nicole!

My grandfather quickly turned and looked at my mother.

GP: Maggie did you see this?
Mom:Yup.It’s what she wanted.

My grandpa began his tattoos are not respectable lecture…Blah blah… In turn I tried to explain to him that my tattoos can not be seen unless I want them to be seen. That at work my clothing covers the tats. Grandpa did not want to hear it….I panicked… forgive me mother for I know not what I do…must save my ass. I pointed to mom…

Mia: She designed them!
He glared at my mother...
Mom: Nobody likes a snitch Mia!

GP :Maggie!
Mom : What? I can't help it if she appreciates my art work. Damn these talented hands of mine to hell!

A few feet away my dad exploded into a fit of laughter.

Ma turned and quickly pointed at my dad.
Mom: By the way her father your son accompanied her to get them and paid for a couple of them too!
Dad : Hey leave me out of this!
Mom: Eh not so funny now is it Mr.Giggles?

My father let out another loud laugh poured himself a glass of water and wisely joined his little brother outside on the balcony.

GP: You’ll never be able to get a respectable job now!
Mom : You know Bill respectable jobs are highly over rated luckily for us she can dance. Know what I’m saying? Her future as a pole dancer is secure!

The woman just can’t help herself can she? That mouth of hers!

He turned and looked at ma slowly and despite trying not to started laughing.
My uncle watching from the balcony came in and put his arm around grandpa and winked at me. Uncle Mike had been at the receiving end of the tattoo lecture years many years ago. “Come on pop give me and Willie a hand with the grill.”and led grandpa out to the balcony where my dad was busy flipping burgers. As he went past me grandpa looked back pointed his finger at me and said, “No more…you hear me?”

Then grandma came over and stood in front of me her hands on her waist like Super Grandma…oh shit…I was in trouble… Grandma never raises her voice, that's grandpa's job she's like a ninja assassin silent but deadly.I looked up at her. Yeah I was in deep trouble.

GM: How many do you have?
I said nothing… I wanted to say I plead the 5th grandma but my grandma didn't look like she was in the mood.

Caity: Five grandma. She has one on her chest grandma and the one on her shoulder blade oh and one on her neck! Oh and she's planning on getting another one.

Yeah definitely that girl is being cut out of my will.

Mia:Caity wipe off that brown spot off your nose!
Caity:Huh? What that means?

Before we could get into it Grandma silenced us with one of her looks…

GM: I saw the one on your neck. Thank God you’re grandfather hasn’t seen it yet.

I reached for my hairclip and let my curls down as she went on…

GM: Mia how many tattoos does your grandfather have?

Was this a trick question? I wasn’t sure how I was supposed to answer this and frankly I was afraid to answer it.

She asked me again… “How many tattoos does your grandpa have?”

Mia: One?

GM: One. He has had one tattoo since he was 17 he is now 65. It’s all faded now and you can barely tell it has my name on it.

wtf was I supposed to say to that?

GM: Do you understand what I am telling you?

No not really grandma….I wanted to say but wisely kept my mouth shut. I wondered if I said no would she strike me?

She repeated her question. Crud this is worse than being on jeopardy! The pressure! Where is a commercial break when I need one?! I decided to fake the funk. I answered “yes” and lowered my eyes as a sign of respect.

She bent down eye level to me raised my sleeve again. She stepped back and looked at my tattoo again…

GM: This is not nice, not nice at all.

The tone in her voice reminded me of the one time she had scolded me as a child. I had failed to go straight home after school and had made my mom worry. Grandma had scolded me in her gentle way and I cried for hours afterwards. My heart felt as if it had been broken. Now here I was years later at the age of 24 experiencing the same feeling all over again. The tone in her voice made my eyes tear up. For a brief second it was as if I were a little kid again.

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Posted by @ 7:08 PM
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Thursday, July 19, 2007

Queen Funkerella

It hit me as soon as I entered the store. WTF?! Wham…boff…bing… whomp all up in my face! My nose tingled, my nostrils flared.

WTF?! Where was that coming from? Who up and died in this here place?!Pungent and acidic the stench entangled itself within my nasal hairs it refused to be snorted out…there was no escape.

I smelled her before I saw her. Her stench walked several feet ahead of her announcing her imminent arrival like some sort of royal page…. Her fellow shoppers were less than amused since it was wafting through the store via the air conditioning. Her scent was of dead bloated sewer rat mingled with curry and raw onion hidden for safe keeping under sweaty hairy armpits. The smell won’t be made into a perfume any time soon I can assure you of that. My head instinctively turned to find the source and of course human nature being what it is of course I took in a deep whiff of the funk. The source of said funky funk was holding court with some sandals at least 8 feet ahead of me in the size 9 aisle. She was tall and majestic and wore a pretty skirt with a floral motif of pink and peach. Her top was pink; her turban was of the same fabric as her skirt even her sandals matched. She was absolutely beautiful. I dubbed her Queen Funkerella.

summer in NYC is hot, humid, and muggy. There’s a lot of us peeps living on this lil’ ol' island so can someone tell me what on earth possesses people to leave their homes without deodorant on? Why do they insist on assaulting fellow New Yorkers with their funk? Why good lord why leave your house smelling like goat ass and go into the most crowded situations you can find? Why?!

The queen seemed oblivious to the stench wafting around her. A stench so thick I’m sure with proper lighting it could’ve been visible. I imagined that once she removed her clothing they’d have to be thrown out. Nothing was ever going to ever make that pretty outfit smell clean again. She held her head high…and I wondered could it really be this woman had no idea that she smelled like the bottom of a landfill? She quickly left after making her purchase a fact we were all grateful for. I could only hope that her funky ass made a stop at the Rite-Aid next door and purchased a shopping bag full of deodorant. Without saying a word one of the store’s employee’s sprayed deodorizer into the air…it didn’t help. The store manager then opened the doors in order to air out the place… still nada zip, nothing helped. Her smell still lingered. I think at that point we would have had to call in a voodoo priest and sacrifice a couple of virgins at the cash register to some shoe god in order to rid the place of the smell.

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Posted by @ 11:28 PM
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Wednesday, July 18, 2007


I was in the Pocono’s meeting the BF’s family when I came across a feral kitten on the edge of the woods that needed some serious help. While all of his siblings seemed healthy and well fed this little guy seemed to be fending for self; ostracized by his mother and the rest of his DNA sharing crew he was covered with dirt, blood, scratches and dried mud. He was infested with fleas and even had a couple of ticks attached to his face. His eyes were a horror; they were sealed shut with a thick crust of something and looked to be infected. Naturally I fell in love with the kitten and decided to bring him back home with me. He spent his first few days here covered in dog drool and spit because the dogs insisted on grooming the little guy. The kitten now named “Belle” is doing a lot better.


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Posted by @ 5:13 PM
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Monday, July 16, 2007

The Fischer Himmel Wedding

Love is a beautiful thing my people. Saturday, 7.7.07 was a big day for my gentle giant in a small wedding ceremony she married Carl the duck sauce to her egg roll.

The thing about weddings is that there is always so much more going on than just the wedding there are side stories going on all over the place. Of course Jackie’s was no different…

Story #1:Follow The Trailer People

I had originally intended to take a friend to the wedding because my BF had to work that day. It didn’t work out that way. For some reason that I couldn’t grasp her family wanted only couples to attend the wedding. If it had been anyone else I would have just skipped the wedding but this was Jackie’s wedding and I was not going to miss it. So instead Joshua took the day off and I threw on some war paint (make-up) and off we went to Floral Park NY…

Because everything was in close proximity the wedding party and guests had no need of cars once we reached Floral Park. We were able to walk from Jackie’s house to the ceremony and then to the reception from there. The walk through Floral Park reminded me of wedding parties I had seen in Egypt making their way through the streets in full wedding regalia, all we needed was some trilling and traveling music. Someone asked which way we were going and Joshua said, “Just follow the trail of people.” Little did we know that this sentence would be a source of potential drama later on.

At the reception one of the tables (groom’s family) across from us kept staring at Josh and not in a warm loving way if you get my drift it seems the eyeball daggers being aimed at Josh had to do with the "follow the trail of people" remark earlier in the day. Being the smart chick she is Jackie wanted to avoid any fights since the combination of a misunderstanding and free flowing booze can be toxic to any social event. She pulled me to the side and asked me about Josh’s remark.

Jackie: Mia did Josh say follow the trailer people?
I burst out laughing because honestly that sounded like something I would say…it seemed someone had heard wrong complained to the groom’s mother about what they thought they heard and she in turn complained to Jackie….

Mia: (still laughing) No . He would never say anything like that. He’s not that type of person now me on the other hand you know…(laughing) What he said was," Follow the trail of people".

Of course me being a smart ass I wanted to add well if they felt the shoe was a fit in terms of trailer people that’s on them but I didn’t. Instead to prove my point I called Josh over and without going into details asked him to repeat the remark…

Josh: Follow the trail of people.

Satisfied Jackie went off to tell her mom-in-law that the person had heard wrong. Later on the mother-in-law apologized to Joshua for the misunderstanding.

Story #2: There’s Puerto Ricans Around Hide Your Wallets.

Everyone was outside waiting for the bride to emerge so we could make our way over to city hall. One of the guests in an attempt at humor remarked to another guest that the wedding looked like a Mexican wedding. Uhhh, no it didn’t. Latino weddings are a beautiful explosion of music, flowers, and intricate colorful decorations and while this wedding was beautiful in itself I saw none of the traditional hoopla of Latino weddings on the street that day. See the thing is the Mexican wedding remark wasn’t met as a compliment it was meant as a dis.
Oh my the clever white girl made a funny! Ha! Ha frigging ha! Excuse me while I slap her laugh along with her.

The chick was so slow that she didn’t even realize she was actually insulting one of her own peeps after all it was their wedding. The other guest knew that I was Puerto Rican and spotting me a few feet ahead of her remarked, “You know there’s Puerto Ricans around hide your wallets. They like to steal.” By the way I guess I should mention that I was the only Puerto Rican other than Josh at the wedding. Ha-ha no inappropriately dressed heffa with huge stain shaped like Russia on shirt Puerto Ricans don’t do the wallet thing that’s some other ethnic group. We Puerto Ricans prefer to steal cars, and to stab you with our switch blades so get your stereo-types straight beeotch.

What the two idiots didn’t realize was that the guy standing behind them was my BF. Joshua sized up the situation and took into consideration the following…
1. It was excruciating hot and humid and I get kind of cranky in that weather. So please for the love of God if you value your life don’t do anything stupid in my presence.

2. My cute shoes were scraping the back of my foot. I wanted nothing more than to take off that damn left shoe and if you gave me a good enough reason I’d beat your ass down with said shoe.

3. My temper. I’m Maggie’s daughter ‘nuff said.

Taking that all in Josh decided to keep what he heard to himself at least until we left the wedding. Ahh yes smart move on his part. Very smart. The last thing anyone needed was the sight of me beating some chick down in the bushes with her own camera.

Story # 3: If You Hurt Her I Will Kill You.

I’ve known Jackie now for about nine years. We’ve stood by each other through some pretty rough times. I was a bit apprehensive about Jackie meeting Joshua because she has never ever liked any of my past boyfriends. The thing with Jackie is that there are no “do overs” you only get one chance with her. If she doesn’t like when she first meets you that’s pretty much it she’ll never like you no matter what you do. Even if you were to run into a burning building and save a shit load of adorable fuzzy handicapped kittens her opinion wouldn’t change.

Finally Jackie came over and had a mini convo with Josh without me.When their convo was over he said nothing, and she went about tending to her guests. On our way home he told me that she had told him she threatened him,“ If you ever do anything to hurt her I will kill you.” And when he looked into her eyes he could tell she meant every word she was saying.

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Posted by @ 4:21 PM
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Friday, July 06, 2007

2 Peas in a Pod

About seven months ago I met a guy. A sweet guy a romantic guy. The type of guy that dedicates songs to you out of the blue. The kind of guy who surprises you with your favorite flowers for no particular reason other than when he saw them he thought of you . He even gives you 6 of them one for every month you’ve been seeing each other.

Seven months ago he asked me out on a date. My response to that was to whip out my phone and take a picture of him. I‘d ended a relationship months earlier and wasn’t too sure if I wanted to jump back into the dating pool. I really didn’t trust my judgment when it came to men at that moment. When I got home I showed my mom the picture and asked for her opinion. “ He has a kind face. Take the chance go for it!” then she added, “You know nena he kind of looks like your father! “ Ma that is so twisted.” I said, but despite that and on my mother’s advice I went out on a date with the guy. It turned out to be a smart move and one of the longest dates known to man.

At one point in our date he decided to show me a picture of his niece and siblings. Like me he is very big into family and as I would discover later on friends as well. Right next to the photo of his niece was a photo of him and a group of friends. It turned out I knew every single person in the photo with him, we had all gone to high school together. He ended up calling every body up in the photo and they joined us on our date. It became a mini-high school reunion that lasted until the evening of the following day. The thing was we didn’t remember each other at all from high school despite the fact that we had so many common friends until one of the girls started prompting our memories. I had been on the tennis team with her …”Mia was the girl that refused to wear the tennis uniform! Remember the one who played all her matches in jeans and timberland boots?!” “The anime girl!” he responded. Here’s the thing I have oxymoron eyes. They’re big yet chinky and when I wear my hair straight with bangs people always say I look like a Japanese anime because of my eyes. In high school at least until my senior year my hairstyle of choice was bangs and a ponytail. Once he said the anime girl I knew he had at least seen me around in high school.

He had been a football player who missed some school because of a knee injury and as a result was behind me by a year. We had no classes together but he did have classes with and was a close friend of my future best friend Reina so he used to see me with her all the time around the school and it turned out he had had a little crush on me then but was too shy to approach me.

The one thing people always say when meeting him for the first time is that he looks a lot like my father. Personally me and my dad don't see it. It gives me the shivers just to think about it.. ewww.As people get to know him they say that personality wise he reminds them of my dad as well. That my friends is true he is very much like my dad in that sense which is a HUGE departure from the guys i've dated in the past. In past relationships I was always the dependable one so it's nice now to have someone on an equal footing with me.

We were on the elevator last night just talking and out of the corner of my eye I saw one of my neighbors checking us out. Other than a nod hello or a smile this woman and I have never had a conversation. Just as we got to our floor the woman pipes up out of nowhere, “You know he looks JUST like your father! They’re like two peas in a pod!” My BF started laughing because he is so used to this by now. My stomach knotted a little and an “ewww” look clouded my face and then the woman said, “There’s nothing wrong with that honey every little girls first love is her daddy.”

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Posted by @ 12:12 AM
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Wednesday, July 04, 2007

Happy Birthday America

I am proud to be an American. While I may not always be proud of my government’s political policies and agendas the love and pride I feel for my country is unwavering, undying, ever lasting. My people are kind hearted generous individuals. We may not always agree with each other but when times are rough we are supportive of each other.

In my country I am free to be who ever I want to be whether that be a doctor, a teacher, a crack head or a whore. I am free to love and marry the person of my own choosing without fear. I am free to congregate with friends of the opposite sex without having to worry what others will think or how it will reflect on my family. If I commit a sin or am accused of such I know I won’t be murdered in order to protect family honor. I am free to wear a head covering or not. I am free to celebrate our politicians or denounce them. I am free to worship any God of my choosing even if it’s one that I made up. I am free. I am free. I am free to be me.

Tonight the sky over NY will be lit up with fire works and as the Declaration of Independence is read I’ll feel my heart swell up with pride as I look out at the river towards the statue of liberty. My eyes will linger over the empty spot where the Twin Towers once stood and undoubtedly my eyes will tear at the memory of what once was. The memory of which makes me love my country all the more, it makes me treasure the freedom I have the freedom I as an American have often taken for granted. Tonight I’ll be reminded of my love for this country and as I look over the people celebrating with us once again I’ll be reminded as to exactly why I love this country so.

Happy Birthday America!

The unanimous Declaration of the thirteen united States of America

When in the Course of human events it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. — That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, — That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security. — Such has been the patient sufferance of these Colonies; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Government. The history of the present King of Great Britain is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute Tyranny over these States. To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world.

He has refused his Assent to Laws, the most wholesome and necessary for the public good. He has forbidden his Governors to pass Laws of immediate and pressing importance, unless suspended in their operation till his Assent should be obtained; and when so suspended, he has utterly neglected to attend to them.

He has refused to pass other Laws for the accommodation of large districts of people, unless those people would relinquish the right of Representation in the Legislature, a right inestimable to them and formidable to tyrants only.

He has called together legislative bodies at places unusual, uncomfortable, and distant from the depository of their Public Records, for the sole purpose of fatiguing them into compliance with his measures.

He has dissolved Representative Houses repeatedly, for opposing with manly firmness his invasions on the rights of the people.

He has refused for a long time, after such dissolutions, to cause others to be elected, whereby the Legislative Powers, incapable of Annihilation, have returned to the People at large for their exercise; the State remaining in the mean time exposed to all the dangers of invasion from without, and convulsions within.

He has endeavoured to prevent the population of these States; for that purpose obstructing the Laws for Naturalization of Foreigners; refusing to pass others to encourage their migrations hither, and raising the conditions of new Appropriations of Lands.

He has obstructed the Administration of Justice by refusing his Assent to Laws for establishing Judiciary Powers.

He has made Judges dependent on his Will alone for the tenure of their offices, and the amount and payment of their salaries.
He has erected a multitude of New Offices, and sent hither swarms of Officers to harass our people and eat out their substance.

He has kept among us, in times of peace, Standing Armies without the Consent of our legislatures.

He has affected to render the Military independent of and superior to the Civil Power.

He has combined with others to subject us to a jurisdiction foreign to our constitution, and unacknowledged by our laws; giving his Assent to their Acts of pretended Legislation:

For quartering large bodies of armed troops among us:

For protecting them, by a mock Trial from punishment for any Murders which they should commit on the Inhabitants of these States:

For cutting off our Trade with all parts of the world:

For imposing Taxes on us without our Consent:

For depriving us in many cases, of the benefit of Trial by Jury:

For transporting us beyond Seas to be tried for pretended offences:

For abolishing the free System of English Laws in a neighbouring Province, establishing therein an Arbitrary government, and enlarging its Boundaries so as to render it at once an example and fit instrument for introducing the same absolute rule into these Colonies

For taking away our Charters, abolishing our most valuable Laws and altering fundamentally the Forms of our Governments:

For suspending our own Legislatures, and declaring themselves invested with power to legislate for us in all cases whatsoever.

He has abdicated Government here, by declaring us out of his Protection and waging War against us.

He has plundered our seas, ravaged our coasts, burnt our towns, and destroyed the lives of our people.

He is at this time transporting large Armies of foreign Mercenaries to compleat the works of death, desolation, and tyranny, already begun with circumstances of Cruelty & Perfidy scarcely paralleled in the most barbarous ages, and totally unworthy the Head of a civilized nation.

He has constrained our fellow Citizens taken Captive on the high Seas to bear Arms against their Country, to become the executioners of their friends and Brethren, or to fall themselves by their Hands.

He has excited domestic insurrections amongst us, and has endeavoured to bring on the inhabitants of our frontiers, the merciless Indian Savages whose known rule of warfare, is an undistinguished destruction of all ages, sexes and conditions.
In every stage of these Oppressions We have Petitioned for Redress in the most humble terms: Our repeated Petitions have been answered only by repeated injury. A Prince, whose character is thus marked by every act which may define a Tyrant, is unfit to be the ruler of a free people.

Nor have We been wanting in attentions to our British brethren. We have warned them from time to time of attempts by their legislature to extend an unwarrantable jurisdiction over us. We have reminded them of the circumstances of our emigration and settlement here. We have appealed to their native justice and magnanimity, and we have conjured them by the ties of our common kindred to disavow these usurpations, which would inevitably interrupt our connections and correspondence. They too have been deaf to the voice of justice and of consanguinity. We must, therefore, acquiesce in the necessity, which denounces our Separation, and hold them, as we hold the rest of mankind, Enemies in War, in Peace Friends.

We, therefore, the Representatives of the united States of America, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme Judge of the world for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good People of these Colonies, solemnly publish and declare, That these united Colonies are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent States, that they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the British Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of Great Britain, is and ought to be totally dissolved; and that as Free and Independent States, they have full Power to levy War, conclude Peace contract Alliances, establish Commerce, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent States may of right do. — And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of Divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes and our sacred Honor. -John Hancock

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