Mia: Shaken Not Stirred

The true life stories of a NYC female.

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Miss Beverly

We were on the way out of the parking lot when I turned around to check on my car and spotted the outrageously drunken woman popping wheelies in her motorized wheel chair. Mom, my brother and I stopped to watch her maneuvering her chair around the parked cars. “Should she even be driving that thing?” I asked. “I have no clue.” “Seriously ma isn’t that like drunk driving?” My brother laughed,“Let me go get her”, he said as said as he jogged towards her.

“Hey Miss Beverly!” he called out to her. “Hey Steven how y’all doing, where your mama at?” she shouted back in her thick southern accent. Steven jerked his head towards where we were standing. “She’s right over there Miss Beverly." Miss Beverly turned her chair towards us and waved with one hand as she balanced the chair on its rear wheels, “Hey Miss Maggie, Hey there little Mia!” “Miss Beverly,” my brother said, “it’s awfully hot out here why don’t I take you inside?” She shook her head and attempted to wave him away nearly falling out of her chair. Oh yeah she was polluted, she was blotto. “Na don’t you worry about me boy I don’t even feel the heat no more.” “Miss Beverly,” he pleaded, “Miss Angie was looking for you earlier. Please let me take you upstairs to her.” she shook her head again reminding me of a mischievous child especially when let out a laugh and squealed “Tag!You’re it!”

Miss Beverly took off and Steven quickly gave chase “Aw come on Miss Beverly don’t make me run my feet hurt!” “Whoa look at her go!” I said as she deftly avoided my brother giggling like a maniac. “Miss Beverly please you’re going to hurt yourself!” Steven yelled. My mom doubled over in laughter and yelled “Go Miss Beverly go!” “You is never gonna catch me little boy I just charged my battery!” Miss Beverly taunted. “Mom don’t encourage her!” Steven whined. Mom wiped a few tears from her eyes. “Oh man I swear that is too funny! Hey Mia do you think I should call the security guard and have him shoot out her tires?”

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