Mia: Shaken Not Stirred


The true life stories of a NYC female.

Wednesday, March 05, 2008

Let it go to voice mail I’ll check it when I’m good and ready


I responded to a my friend's text message the other day and quickly realized that she was not the one texting me instead it was a guy she'd recently started seeing.

Unfortunately the guy doesn’t know me and no one warned him about my sarcasm. Rumor has it he’s afraid to meet me now.

G’s Phone: Hey Pedro said if u and Josh wanna come bowling manana
who the hell is Pedro? I searched my brain for the answer and then remembered Guay mentioning him.

Mia: I can’t this weekend mid-terms start Monday. I’ve got some studying to do and I’m tutoring again. We can all do something next weekend, that would be cool okay?

G’s Phone: Ok sooo we can do something next time sugar tits lol. Sounds keen lol:-D

Keen? WTF? she never says keen. Sugar tits yes. Keen no. Obviously who ever it is has heard Guay call me sugar tits and think it’s cool for them to do so as well. Obviously they’d missed the memo on who’s allowed to call me sugar tits.

Mia: Who is this?

G’s Phone: Guay

Mia: Uh no it isn’t. Identify yourself.

G’s Phone: This is Guay lol :-)

Mia: and I’m the good witch Glenda. Look I know it’s not Guay. Guay would stab herself in the eye with a hot fork before she ever used the word “keen”. Who is this?

G’s Phone: It’s Pedro

Mia: Where’s G?

G’s Phone: Watching TV

Mia: Okay and why do YOU have her phone?

unlike me Guay has a lot of crap to hide and this guy hanging onto her phone could only create drama for her with her baby’s daddy or one of the other guys she’s messing with. Yeah my girl is a player with a tight game and she’s never been busted but this jack ass holding onto her phone is not a good omen. Plus I know the female she doesn’t relinquish control of her phone like that to anyone unless she’s getting sloppy now.

A few more text messages were exchanged and it became obvious to me the guy wasn’t giving up the phone. I ended the flurry of messages by informing him that I’d call Guay later on. A few minutes later Guay called and explained that the guy had been installing some ring tones for her. “Yeah so why the hell is he text messaging me acting like he’s you?” “I don’t know.” “Tell him to chill with that, that’s not cute.” “Oh yeah and what’s the deal with him calling me sugar tits?” “What?!” “He called me sugar tits. Tell your boy to calm himself before I end up punching him in the face Guay. You and me cool, you and me we do sugar tits. Me and him no cool, me and him we no do sugar tits. Let him know the deal. ” “I’ll handle it Mia.”

The next day I texted Guay about some books and once again Pedro responded. Now he was getting to be annoying. I felt something shift inside of me oh oh smart ass Mia was taking control of my phone…


Mia: Oh I'm sorry did I text you? I swore the phone I texted was Guay’s. My bad.


G’s Phone: Diz is her phone :-)

common sense should have told the bastard to hand over the phone to Guay but common sense seemed to be in short supply on this day.


Mia: Oh I’m sorry Pedro. I keep texting Guay and YOU keep replying. Obviously something must be wrong with my phone b/c I keep getting you instead.

G’s Phone: No diz is her phone lmao :-D

dude those little smiley faces are not serving to placate me, on the contrary they are irking me.


Mia: Oh ok so I guess her SIM card must be in your phone cause you keep replying. Silly me for not realizing that silly, silly me.


G’s Phone: No its her phone lmao :-D



Mia: Uh huh I see Guay hired a secretary to dictate her thoughts to tell her I’ll call her later. By the way what time do you take lunch? I’ll be sure to call while you’re on your break.


A few minutes later I get a message…

G’s Phone: Yo sugartits!

so help me God that better be Guay b/c if he’s using it I will hop in a cab to Guay’s house right now and kick him in the nuts. It turned out it was Guay and he had her phone b/c once again he was installing some new ring tones. “Yo Guay you know if he’d stop text messaging me he’d get it done much sooner.”



Like I said my life is an open book, nothing to hide here. How ever my privacy is to be respected. The only way a male would ever be allowed to answer my phone is if I had a bullet wound and were unable to lift my arm to answer the phone myself and the ring tone tells me it’s my mama. Other than that don’t touch my phone fool, let it go to voice mail I’ll check it when I’m good and ready.





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Posted by @ 11:01 AM
4 comment from: Blogger Mia, Blogger DannieS72, Blogger Tapsalteerie, Blogger Mia,