Sunday, March 19, 2006

Mourn in Peace



My mother and La Negra

I heard music coming from my parents’ room early this morning. Mom was sitting by her window. She was oblivious to the fact that I was standing in her doorway. The window was open, she was staring out at the water. She closed her eyes, resting her chin on her hand covering the slight cleft in her chin with her thumb.I thought she was meditating. I noticed her old 45 record player sitting on her night stand on it was one of La Negra’s old 45 records playing. The air was filled with an old romantic ballad “Somos Novios” written and preformed by the legendary Mexican composer Armando Manzanero . I remember this song; it was my grandparent’s song. In this country it was a hit in English for Perry Como entitled “It’s Impossible”.

I was about to say something to her when I noticed she let out a deep sigh. I felt as if someone had reached into my chest and wrung my heart with their bare hands. My mother was crying. I stood at her doorway watching the stream of tears escaping from her seemingly closed eyes. My eyes glanced over to my parent’s bed there was a crate of photos on it. My parents had been cleaning out their closet which explained why the old record player and 45’s were out. On top of the bed were several photos of my late grandmother. I now understood why my mother was crying. Thirty seven years old is far too young for a woman to pass away and leave her only daughter motherless and even though twenty years have passed there are days when the pain and the longing make it seem like it was only yesterday.

It seemed wrong to approach her, to intrude on her grief. I softly closed the door behind me, sometimes words are of no help and a person just needs to mourn in peace.


::Somos Novios:: by Armando Manzanero::

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Labels: death, mom

Posted by @ 4:28 PM
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